What To Do If You’re Having Doubts About Your Sexual Orientation in a Committed Relationship

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If you are in a committed relationship with someone else, you understand how exciting it can be. You love spending time with your partner, you may think about spending your entire life with that person, and you might look forward to what happens next. Then, suddenly, you may realize that you are questioning your sexual orientation. Nothing is wrong with that, but you might be curious about what it means. How should you react to this situation, and what do you need to do next? 

Understand If It Is Your Partner Or You

If you question your sexual orientation when you are in a committed relationship, you first need to figure out whether it is your partner or you. For example, even if you are heterosexual, you will not be attracted to every member of the opposite sex. There are certain things that you find attractive. You need to figure out if you are not attracted to your partner or if you are not attracted to the entire gender. People can change their sexual orientation over time, and you need to figure out what you are experiencing. You may want to spend some time with yourself, thinking about what you truly want and what you enjoy. 

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Find an Emotional Support Structure

It can be incredibly stressful to start questioning your sexual orientation, especially if you are in a committed relationship. You need to make sure that you have a strong support structure available. You should start with your partner. If your partner truly cares about you, they should support you as you try to find yourself. You may also want to talk to your friends and family, as they should be supportive. You probably don’t want to talk about this with everyone, but it is something that you need to discuss with the people you trust the most. 

Do Not Label It

One of the most common mistakes people make if they go through this process is that they are trying to label it as quickly as possible. Even though there are a few standard labels that people use to describe their sexuality, you do not necessarily need to label yourself. You probably don’t want to label your sexual orientation right now, and you may not want to label it at all. There is nothing wrong with that. You do not want to pigeonhole yourself into a specific category, as it will only worsen your emotional situation. Instead, allow yourself to learn more about yourself. Then, a label in the future, but only if it is appropriate.

Mirror What You Hear

As you talk to other people about what you are going through, you should try to remember what you hear. What this means is that other people are going to talk to you about their experiences. You may want to learn from their experiences, taking what is most important and comfortable to you. Then, see if you can find yourself in the same manner. It can be challenging to go on this journey on your own, and that is why you should not try to do so. Instead, try to mirror what you hear and see if it can help you find yourself.

Find a Professional Who Can Help You

Finally, you should not hesitate to contact a professional who can help you. There are going to be a lot of challenges that you face along the way, and you may want to reach out to a mental health professional who can assist you. You might even want to find someone specializing in this area, such as Pride Counseling.

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Learning More About Yourself Is Natural in a Committed Relationship

Ultimately, if you are in a committed relationship and questioning your sexual orientation, this is not something that you should ignore. You need to address it on your own, and you need to take the time to get to know yourself better. At the same time, it is something that you need to talk about with your partner. You and your partner need to get on the same page about what this means, and you need to find a way to develop the emotional support you require. You may also want to reach out to a professional who can help you learn more about yourself and point you in the right direction. That way, you can put yourself and your partner in a position to be successful, regardless of whether this is together or apart.

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