If you have recently had children, you understand that it can be a fascinating journey. But, at the same time, it can be frustrating if you feel like the spark is no longer there when you and your partner crawl into bed with one another. So, even though your focus will be on your children, you must also focus on each other. Otherwise, your marriage could suffer. So, what are some of the most common reasons you might lose the spark in bed after having children?
1. Not Enough Time
Undoubtedly, one of the most common reasons couples lose the spark in the bedroom after having kids is that there is insufficient time. If you have a newborn baby, they will need to eat every few hours. Then, as your child gets older, you will be pulled in multiple directions by school obligations, sports, music, and more. As a result, you may not have time to spend in the bedroom with each other.
2. Not Enough Energy
You might also feel like you don’t have enough energy to crawl into bed with your partner and enjoy their company. Because of how much time you spend with your children, you may not have enough time to spend with each other. To fix this issue, you must be intentional with your scheduling. You might want to schedule some time for your child to spend the night at someone else’s house.
3. Too Much Stress
If you feel tremendous stress, it can impact your intimacy level with your partner. When you come home from work, you may feel like you are still stressed out because you have a lot of obligations with the children. If you think of tremendous stress in your life, you won’t have a lot of emotional energy left over for your partner. You must make sure you control your stress levels accordingly.
4. A Lack of Self-Esteem
If you don’t have a lot of self-esteem, it can drive the passion right out of your marriage. For example, you may feel like you are getting older and don’t look quite as beautiful as you used to. Or, you may feel like you always look disheveled because you are chasing around a bunch of toddlers. You need to focus on your self-esteem, and if you feel like you have some mental health issues, you may want to reach out to a professional who can help you.
5. A Clash in Parenting Styles
One of the significant parts of having children is that you will learn much about your partner. Unfortunately, this also means that your parenting styles can clash from time to time. When that happens, it can create a feeling of resentment. If you resent your partner, it will impact your passion for one another in the bedroom. Be mindful of your feelings with your partner, and don’t bottle everything up inside.
6. A Lack of Non-Physical Intimacy
You may also feel a lack of non-physical intimacy in your life. This means that you may not know your partner well anymore. People change as they grow up, no matter their age. As you focus all of your energy on your children, you may not be focusing your attention on your partner. You may not even ask your partner how their day was. If you don’t have a lot of not physical intimacy, you won’t have any physical intimacy either.
7. Possible Medical Concerns
Finally, you may not have a lot of intimacy in your life because of possible medical concerns. People change when they get older, and their hormone levels can also change. You must ensure you stay on top of your preventive medical care. That way, you can identify possible issues causing intimacy problems in your life. You need to take care of yourself if you want to take care of your family.
Keep the Passion in Your Marriage Alive
There are many reasons why the start may no longer be there. You must take a well-rounded approach if you are looking for a way to preserve the spark in the bedroom. Remember that you also need to be open to your partner’s opinions. They may have some great ideas that you can use to keep the passion alive. That way, you can be the best possible parents and make sure that you are still madly in love with one another.
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