7 Most Common Reasons We’re Not Happy Even If Nothing Obvious Is Wrong with Our Lives

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When nothing is wrong with your life, yet you still don’t feel happy, you must delve deeper to find the reasons. General unhappiness does not always indicate depression, but when it’s constant and lasts more than two weeks, you should seek help for the problem.

Feeling sad is a normal human response and is not unusual. Still, when accompanied by irritability, pessimism, fatigue, lack of interest in things you enjoy, appetite changes, and concentration and memory problems, then it could be depression.

Here are the seven most common reasons why you aren’t happy even if nothing obvious is wrong:

1.      You’re Not Living in the Moment

It would help if you spent more time living in the moment and not overthinking things that have happened in the past or may come in the future. One of the main downsides of overthinking is that your mind never rests, especially at night. The result is that instead of enjoying a deep and refreshing sleep, your mind fills up with thoughts.

When your thoughts dwell on things that have or could go wrong, you miss out on everything you love. The best way to find happiness is by living in the moment. However, the brain can’t tell the difference between the emotions felt now and those from the past, so if you must contemplate, do it with positive and beautiful thoughts.

2.      You Consider Yourself a Victim

Sometimes you may feel that bad things only happen to you or that you are the only one doing all the work at home or the office. When you constantly see yourself as a victim, you forget that things happen to everyone, not just to you.

Generalizing makes it difficult for you to find happiness, so you need to reframe your mind. For example, if you feel everyone treats you meanly, take a deeper look at your day and recall moments when someone treated you nicely. So, stop seeing yourself as a victim since this practice is blocking your path to feeling happy.

3.      You’re Comparing Your Life to Others

Fix My Life host and life coach Iyanla Vanzant has said, “Comparing yourself to others is an act of violence against your authentic self.”

That is true because enjoying life is impossible when you constantly want what others have. Even though, as social creatures, it is a natural impulse, most of us concentrate on the material things that make us feel envious and inadequate instead of looking to find the things that meaningfully make us content.

Unfortunately, social media does not help improve these feelings of discontent because it bombards you with images of the perfect lifestyle, even though you have everything you need. Furthermore, comparisons can instantly rob you of your happiness, taking away your feelings of contentment. You don’t need to stop seeing friends or following social media, but stop seeing or following those that erode your self-esteem.

4.      You Fear Being Alone

The chances are that your first love or partner won’t be with you forever, but the thought of it is terrifying if you have never been alone. Unfortunately, for some people, this means finding a partner immediately after a breakup or death, often with the wrong person.

Therefore, finding, understanding, and learning to love your company is essential, even if you are in a good relationship. In the long run, this will serve you well and help you understand others better. When you know your expectations and needs, you can always find happiness and understand the behavior of others.

5.      You’re Not Providing For Your Needs

Your body requires nourishment, sleep, and loving care. If you neglect these basic needs, the chances of feeling unhappy increase significantly. So rethink all the things that make you happy, and spend some time of the day nurturing your basic and spiritual needs, whether taking a walk in nature, practicing yoga, or spending time with the people or animals you love.

6.      You’re Not Practicing Gratitude

“I think the most common myth about happiness is when you say ‘I will be happy when,’” according to psychology professor and author Sonja Lyubomirsky. The problem is not with setting goals like losing weight, getting a promotion, finding a partner, or having a baby, but linking these to your happiness.

Lyubomirsky explains that achieving goals does bring happiness, but the feeling does not last, and studies show that you will most likely revert to feeling unhappy. Major life events cannot change overall satisfaction, but gratitude can. Therefore, practice gratitude by saying a prayer or keeping a gratitude journal; the more you practice, the more centered you can remain.

7. You’re Letting Your Emotions Control You

Your mind is a brilliant tool that can help you control your emotions. Several practices like prayer and meditation can help you to make sense of the world, helping you to rid yourself of any negative feelings that make you feel worthless.

Final Take

Working on your mindset and physical health is an excellent start to finding happiness. However, if you still battle with unhappiness after ridding yourself of these common reasons, you may have clinical depression. However, in that case, you cannot tackle the problem alone, and it’s best to reach out to a therapist to help you find enjoyment in life.

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