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Mental health and identity are deeply connected, yet many workplaces and communities fail to create spaces where people feel truly seen. Psychotherapist Malka Shaw has spent her career helping individuals navigate trauma, inclusion, and belonging—whether working with refugees, marginalized employees, or, most recently, Jewish professionals facing rising antisemitism. In this conversation, she shares powerful insights on what it takes to create genuine psychological safety, advocate for mental health, and build resilience in an increasingly complex world
📌 What You’ll Learn:
- How Jewish values shaped Malka’s path into mental health.
- Why trauma and identity are deeply linked—and what that means for healing.
- What workplaces get wrong about psychological safety (and how to fix it).
- How marginalized employees can advocate for their mental health needs at work.
- What non-Jewish allies can do to support Jewish colleagues post-October 7th.
- A simple but powerful technique to build daily resilience.
Malka, thank you for taking the time to share your expertise with us. For those who may not be familiar with your work, could you tell us a bit about yourself and your journey to becoming a mental health professional?
Oh, I love this question. It’s always fun to reflect on how it all started. Honestly, like a lot of people in this field, I was probably a little young, a little naive, and thought I could save the world. I laugh about it now, but there was definitely that idealistic spark. At the core, though, it was my Jewish values that really guided me. That deep-rooted belief in caring for others, repairing the world, and the responsibility we have to each other.
The idea of tikkun olam—making the world a better place—was something I grew up with, and it’s always shaped how I see people and community. I was also just fascinated by human behavior—what makes people tick, why we struggle, and how we find our way back to healing. I couldn’t get enough of it. And honestly, I think I was doing this work before I even knew it was a career.
In college, I was the person everyone came to when they were going through something. Whether it was roommate drama, breakups, or family issues, people just trusted me with their stories. I felt so honored by that, and I realized how much I loved being there for others. So, it started as this blend of curiosity, compassion, and maybe a little overconfidence, but it grew into something I’m deeply passionate about. It’s been an incredible journey, and I’m still learning every day.
Your work centers around creating psychologically safe spaces, especially within the context of identity and inclusion. Can you walk us through a pivotal moment in your career that solidified this focus for you?
Absolutely. One of the most pivotal experiences early in my career was my internship at the New York Association for New Americans (NYANA). I was working with immigrants and refugees—people who had fled war, persecution, and upheaval, often arriving with nothing but the clothes on their backs. Their resilience was extraordinary, but what struck me just as deeply was how essential a sense of safety and belonging was to their healing. It wasn’t just about finding a job or learning English; it was about rebuilding their identity in a place where they often felt invisible or misunderstood.
That experience really cemented for me how trauma and identity are intertwined. When people feel their identity is under threat—whether because of war, displacement, or discrimination—it affects every part of their well-being. I saw how creating spaces where they could be seen, heard, and valued made a real difference.
Fast forward to October 7th, and everything I had learned came flooding back, but this time it was closer to home. The brutal attack on Israel and the global surge in antisemitism that followed hit me not only as a mental health professional but as a Jewish person. Suddenly, my own community was experiencing that same sense of fear and displacement—not physically, but emotionally.
People were questioning their safety, their place in society, even their right to grieve. That was a turning point. I realized that the work I had been doing for decades—creating those psychologically safe spaces—was needed now more than ever, but this time within my own community.
That’s what led me to found Kesher Shalom Projects, blending my background in trauma therapy with education around antisemitism and cultural competence. Because at the end of the day, whether you’re a refugee starting over or a Jewish person facing hate, we all need the same thing—to feel safe in who we are.
You mentioned the importance of cultural competency and identity-affirming care in mental health. What’s one specific practice or approach that you’ve found particularly effective in helping clients feel seen and validated?
One approach I’ve found especially effective is starting each session with genuine curiosity about a client’s background, values, and how their identity shapes their experience. Rather than assuming, I invite them to teach me about what matters most to them—whether it’s their faith, culture, family dynamics, or personal traditions. This sets the tone that their identity isn’t just acknowledged—it’s central to our work together. I also explore how societal biases or discrimination may impact their mental health, validating those experiences rather than minimizing them.
When clients see that their whole self is welcome, it fosters trust and allows deeper healing. It’s not about having all the answers—it’s about being present, listening with humility, and ensuring they know their story matters. That kind of affirmation can be transformative, especially for those who’ve felt unseen or judged in other spaces.
You’ve spoken about the need for workplaces to move beyond ‘checkboxes’ when it comes to psychological safety. Can you share an example of a time you witnessed a company successfully create that deeper sense of safety you described, and what made it impactful?
Absolutely. I worked with an organization that initially brought me in because they were struggling with employee burnout and concerns about bias, but what stood out was their willingness to do more than just check a box. Instead of hosting a single training or drafting a new DEI statement, they committed to creating ongoing spaces for honest, open conversations. They held regular small-group check-ins where employees could talk about their experiences without worrying it would come back to haunt them.
Leaders actively participated, not just as observers, but as people, and they were also given space to be vulnerable and reflect on their own blind spots. Over time, you could feel the difference. People started saying they felt valued, like they could actually be themselves without walking on eggshells. And honestly, nothing lowers the guard like sharing a good meal.
How can individuals, particularly those from marginalized communities, advocate for their own mental health needs in a work environment that may not fully understand their experiences?
Advocating for your mental health at work can be challenging, especially when your experiences feel invisible or misunderstood. A good first step is identifying allies, whether it is a colleague, supervisor, or someone in HR, who can offer support and help amplify your concerns. When raising an issue, framing it as something that impacts both your well-being and your ability to contribute effectively can shift the focus from personal struggle to a shared goal.
Being clear and specific about what you need, whether it is flexibility, mental health resources, or simply acknowledgment, can also help others respond more thoughtfully. It is important to remember that you are not obligated to educate others about your identity or trauma, but sometimes offering context can open the door to greater understanding. Setting boundaries is equally key; you deserve to feel respected and safe, even if others do not fully understand your experience. Ultimately, speaking up is not only self-advocacy but also an opportunity to shift the culture toward greater empathy and inclusion.
For Jewish employees, particularly after October 7th, this need has become even more urgent. Many have faced grief, fear, and rising antisemitism, only to encounter silence or dismissal in their workplaces. Some have felt pressured to hide their identity, while others found their distress minimized or ignored. In these moments, asking for acknowledgement can be powerful by simply saying, “I need you to understand that this is affecting me.”
Some employees have requested internal listening sessions or affinity spaces where Jewish staff can support one another. Others have encouraged leadership to publicly denounce antisemitism, demonstrating that the company’s values truly apply to all marginalized communities. We can also work toward creating an environment where all holidays are recognized in some small way, ensuring that every employee feels seen and valued. The goal is not perfection but fostering a workplace where no one has to choose between their mental health and their identity.
You’ve highlighted the unique challenges faced by Jewish employees in the wake of rising antisemitism. What advice would you give to non-Jewish colleagues or supervisors who want to be allies but might not know where to start?
Being an ally begins with a willingness to listen and learn, even when it feels uncomfortable or unfamiliar. For non-Jewish colleagues and supervisors, the first step is acknowledging that antisemitism exists and that Jewish employees may be carrying grief, fear, or anxiety that is not always visible. Start by creating opportunities for open, judgment-free conversations.
This can be as simple as checking in privately with a Jewish colleague and asking, “How are you doing? Is there anything you need?” These small gestures can go a long way in showing that you see their humanity and care about their well-being.
Educating yourself is equally important. Take time to read about antisemitism, both its history and the ways it shows up today. Understanding that antisemitism often looks different from other forms of bias can help prevent dismissing or minimizing what someone is experiencing. You do not need to be an expert, but showing you care enough to learn builds trust.
When Jewish employees express concerns, believe them. Avoid making statements like “I’m sure they didn’t mean it that way” or “That’s not really antisemitism, is it?” These kinds of responses, even when well-intentioned, can leave someone feeling dismissed and isolated. Instead, try “I hear you, and I want to understand more.”
Taking visible action is also key. This can be speaking up if you witness antisemitic comments or stereotypes or encouraging company leadership to address antisemitism as part of their broader commitment to diversity, equity, and inclusion. It also means being mindful of Jewish holidays, both by acknowledging them and by avoiding scheduling major meetings or deadlines on those days.
Since October 7th, many Jewish employees have experienced not only fear but also a profound sense of betrayal. Some have seen silence or indifference from those they once considered friends or allies. For many, this has been as painful as the external hostility. Allies can help repair this hurt by stepping forward now—offering support, naming antisemitism when they see it, and showing that Jewish employees are valued and not alone.
Above all, being an ally is not about being perfect. It is about showing up, being curious, and committing to creating a workplace where everyone feels seen and safe.
Resilience is a key theme in your work. What’s one practical step someone can take today to cultivate greater resilience in the face of daily stressors?
One practical step someone can take today to build greater resilience is to practice anchoring in the present moment. When we are under stress, our minds often race ahead to worst-case scenarios or get stuck replaying what went wrong. Taking a few minutes to pause and ground yourself can interrupt that cycle. This can be as simple as taking three slow, deep breaths and noticing what is around you—what you see, hear, or feel in your body. It is a way to remind your nervous system that you are safe right now, even if things feel hard.
From that place, you can choose your next step with more clarity, instead of reacting purely from fear. It is also important to remember that resilience does not always feel strong in the moment. Clients often tell me, “I don’t feel resilient, I feel like I’m barely holding on,” and that is the key—resilience is not about feeling invincible. It is the ability to keep moving forward in the face of doubt or fear, even when it feels uncomfortable. It is showing up for yourself, one small step at a time, even on the days when you are not sure you can. Those moments of struggle are often when resilience is being built, even if it does not feel that way right then.
What message do you hope to leave readers with when it comes to prioritizing their mental well-being, both personally and professionally?
The message I hope to leave readers with is that prioritizing your mental well-being is not a luxury; it is a necessity—both personally and professionally. We often push through stress, telling ourselves we will rest later or that everyone else’s needs are more important. But the truth is, you cannot truly care for others if you are neglecting yourself. I often think of the lifeguard analogy. Lifeguards are trained not to immediately grab a drowning person because panic can cause the person to pull the rescuer under.
Instead, they first extend a rescue buoy—giving the person something to hold onto so they can begin to feel safe and regain control. Only once the person has calmed down does the lifeguard make physical contact and guide them to shore. The same is true in life. You cannot help others if you are sinking. Taking care of your mental health is like reaching for that buoy—it steadies you so that you can better support those around you, without being pulled under yourself. Caring for your well-being is not selfish; it is what allows you to show up fully for the people and work that matter to you.
- Creating Safe Spaces: A Conversation with Malka Shaw, Psychotherapist and Advocate for Mental Well-Being - February 23, 2025
- 11 Ways Therapy Can Help You Overcome Life’s Challenges - February 9, 2025
- 9 Ways Mindfulness Practices Can Positively Impact Your Daily Routine - February 9, 2025
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